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Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Goodbye, Barry

Somehow I always thought I would have another day. That there would be another fascinating blog post, full of humor facing a terrible situation. That there would be another round of treatment, another battle in the war we all knew was likely to be ultimately lost.
I knew my friend's cancer was a quick and deadly type, and that a year was about the most that one could expect.
Is it a year already?
Yes; and indeed more than that.
But...
Nobody's ready yet. Why couldn't Barry be the miracle patient? Why couldn't he be in the 15% and not the 85?
A year is not enough!
Barry is gone now.
He was suffering, and there was no real fixing that. I'm glad he's not suffering any more. But I want the old Barry back, the one who observed everything, who translated for his dog, the one who went walking on the bluffs above the lake, the one who shared his humor and wit and compassion with us daily.
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Our time was too short! I never got to meet you in person. Never finished that sweater.
It was an honor to be your friend.
I'm looking forward to the day, in a month or a year or whenever, when your book comes out and I can read your stories again and again. I hope it comes with pictures!
Adieu!

10 comments:

Tabor said...

The world is a more empty place today for sure. I, like you, kept thinking there would be more time or even a miracle. Surely for Barry miracles were made! Tonight I will raise a glass in his sweet memory.

Reya Mellicker said...

I, too, was thinking about that sweater this morning. Thinking about you and how happy I am that we had lunch. Did I ever thank you for the chocolates? They're long gone now. Delicious.

Thanks for this beautiful tribute. xx

NanU said...

Hi Reya,
the sweater is out of yarn (again! the darned thing eats yarn), and I didn't find a shop that carries it on my last morning in DC. Friends farther west will furnish me with some, but it will take time.
Glad you enjoyed the chocolates. They're even better when not abused as they were by extremes of temperature. Not for saving, either. Good chocolate is delicate and does not last. I'll bring more next time!

Bonnie said...

Your love for Barry shines through in this tribute. May his light continue to shine through those of us who loved him. Take care ...

Kerry said...

Barry had such a strong and endearing voice that it is really hard to believe it's gone. I'm looking forward to his book as well, and feel grateful that he left behind so much of himself in his writing.

Kathryn Magendie said...

Me, too - same thoughts but I didn't say them as you did so beautifully.

I thought today how Barry reached so many - made so many fall in love with him and his life, those of us who never laid eyes on him felt as if we had been friends with him for a lifetime.

*sad day*

Niamh B said...

Sorry to hear it NanU

x

Totalfeckineejit said...

That is so sad.Sorry NanU.

Sarah said...

Awww hon...sending hugs to you! I was heartbroken when I heard too...so wanted him to rebound and be his old self! Beautiful post hon, Sarah

Pauline said...

Thanks for expressing that so beautifully, Nan. Barry was a remarkable man who took so many of us along on his remarkable journey. I know he will live on in our hearts.